The Punisher

the punisherI give myself this nickname, “the punisher” because lately, no matter what my goal is on a run (relax, de-stress, build base), I end up doing grueling, punishing speed work. I head out and tell myself, “you are going to take it easy today, it’s not a race,” and I wind up pushing myself so hard that I can barely finish. I’m talking about the dizzy, nauseating type of running that one should only do if they are trying to PR or qualify for Boston.

Here are some theories about why I’m doing this to myself:

  • I am annoyed with my comfortable pace; it’s slower than it used to be (pre-babies).
  • It’s hard to fit in a run lately, due to my husband’s busy schedule, so I want to maximize my time.
  • My runs and pace are posted to social media (oh the pressure!).
  • I wore a bikini to the pool (enough said here).
  • I’m angry about something.

It’s probably a combination of all of the above, but I need to lock it up. My strategies include:

  • Putting a plan on paper to force specific types of runs on different days; this will allow for recovery (easy running!) and speed work.
  • Stop sharing my runs on social media. I don’t think anyone even looks at them anyway.
  • Wear a one-piece bathing suit for a few more weeks.
  • Add some weight training to compliment my running and get bikini-ready faster.
  • Address some of my annoyances.

I’m looking forward to a more balanced running life, but the first step in this process was to recognize my behavior. I love a challenging run, to feel fast and strong, but there are ways to get there without punishing oneself every step of the way. — Amie

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