Rookie Rule #23

Bad bib placement.

Bad bib placement runs in this family.

Pin Your Bib Front and Center.

Race gear can get complicated. Layers! Energy supplements! Ear buds! The list goes on and on.

But here’s something you need not over-complicate: Your race bib.

It’s easy, folks. Pin your bib on your stomach. Below your chest, above your crotch, right in the middle of your torso. If you’re questioning bib placement, aim for your belly button. (An added bonus of proper bib placement? It’s flattering to the mid-section. You’re welcome.)

Here are some places you should not pin your bib:

  • The back of your shirt. No one behind you cares what your number is, and photographers can’t tag your photos. Come on, you’re smarter than that.
  • The top of your shirt. Aside from looking dumb, this is going to rub you (potential chafing hazard) and adversely affect the way your shirt moves.
  • Hanging off the bottom of your shirt. If you don’t pin all four corners, you risk annoying bib flappage mid-race. Also annoying, your legs are going to kick your bib.
  • The side of your shirt. Yes, I’ve seen people do this. I have no idea why people would do this. Do not do this.

And please, attempt to pin it on straight. Happy racing, Angels! — Aidz

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Respect the Distance

Hitting the WallI made a rookie mistake this weekend: I forgot to respect the distance and my body all but gave out.

When you increase your mileage week after week, you start to feel invincible. When you run eight miles, 10 doesn’t seem so bad, but there is a threshold, a point in which you need to respect the road, if you will. For me, it’s usually the 10-miler. I’ve made this mistake many times, but here I am again, shaking my head at my rookieness.

  • Give yourself plenty of time to eat and hydrate before your run. I ignored this and just drank coffee.
  • Take water and sustenance for the run itself. Did I do this? Nope.
  • Mentally prepare. I didn’t give it a second thought, even when Doug kept asking me, “Are you sure you want to run 10?”

When I passed the eight-mile marker, my fatigue all but consumed me — I was light-headed, delirious (hello, wall), and it hit me. I had done it again, I had made the same mistake again and I was going to have to shuffle home in shame, hopefully having learned my lesson this time.

Respect the road, respect the distance, respect your body, and only then will you reap the real benefits of distance running. — Amie

Rookie Rule #19

andrea-detroit-marathon-2012

First-time Bad Angel Andrea shows her horns like a seasoned pro.

Learn Proper Horn Placement.

Taking good race photos is a learned art. If you’re still sifting through crappy race pics, fear not; in time, you’ll learn how to deal with these. To start, let’s discuss the art of proper horns in a race photo.

  1. Stick up your pointer finger and pinky. All your other phalanges should be locked and loaded.
  2. Tuck in yer thumb. Otherwise, you’re signing to the world that you love them. (It’s OK, we love you, too.)
  3. If you’re placing your horns atop your head, make sure they’re nice and high. Otherwise, we can’t see past your giant noggin.
  4. Point your horns up, not forward. Tipping horns look like your head is under attack from a weird rabbit.
  5. Worried about horn placement? Forget it all and just throw them in the air for all the world to see.
  6. Own the horns. You are a Bad Angel. Capital B, Capital A.

Aidz

Rookie Rule #18

Move on back. You'll like it there. Promisemeanit.

Move on back. You’ll like it there. Promisemeanit.

Walk to the Back.

This is a rant, or maybe just a public service announcement for runners. I mean no disrespect to race walkers, but if you plan to walk in that first mile, please (PLEASE!) move to the back. It’s hard enough to dodge and weave and find that comfortable spot and settle into your pace without having to trip over walkers.

Please, and thank you. –Amie